rip it out and then chew it a few times

just came back from merdeka carnival.
which wasnt as dead as i thought it would have been.
sad part was i didnt get a placing.
only cause i was halfway dying.
stupid me
i shouldnt have ran yesterday.
i tired myself out.
-.-

BUT!
GREEN GOT SECOND FOR THE PATRIOTIC RUN. :)
AND WE DIDNT GET LAST FOR THE SUPER CHAMPION HSE.
(apparently that what i heard la)

AND!
the prom committee made a lot of money. :)
and we won 3rd for best decorated booth! whooh.
you know why,
cause we dressed up yo!

so muhibah kan?
:)


with our cash money. :)
we were practically screaming okay the minute they announced we got third.
i didnt wear no punjabi suit for nothing!
it was freaking hot okay!

abit of the view.
im sure there'll be more pics posted up on facebook.

oh did i mention?
a girl won an iphone for a lucky draw.
the grand prize.
and ive never seen her in school before.
AT ALL!
-.-
lucky girl.


heh.
i got home, feeling upset.
and i feel like tonight would be a good time to run down memory lane.
just to remember what it was like before
it all felt like a mess.
so i think im going on my ship.
sigh.

boy,do you really know how to kill someone's joy within
minutes.
i feel like crying.
i really do.
ive torn myself up about this for almost two weeks. ever since i had trials.
and im wondering what the hell my conclusion is.

conclusion after two weeks of agonizing thoughts? : i have absolutely no idea.

what do i do now?
i dont feel like i can turn to you anymore.
really.
its feels like you've kept me in a box somewhere, and you'll only open it
when you feel like it.
till then, i'll sit in the dark hoping that the day i get to see sunshine and hear
the words ive been longing for
will come sooner than i think.

i dont think god likes me very much these days.
i feel like he's trying to teach me a lesson.
i just DONT KNOW what the hell it is.

xoxo