oh wait. you did. -.-

independence is something im yet to figure out.

happy 52nd merdeka malaysia.
do us proud for the years yet to come. (:

so much for fireworks.
there was practically no BOOMS OR BANGS.
so i ended up sleeping
around 12.
grrrr



i have no idea whats on the agenda for today.
bummer.
school's starting tomorrow. :(

xx
edit//

so, i spent my whole afternoon watching tv. :)
the biggest looser in particular and everything else on the cooking channels. lol
till i made mum go grocery shopping at giant.
spent an hour or so there and then came home
to more tv.
and here i am.
:)

i need to go back to school.
its getting boring at home.
sigh.
results. :(
f you.

xoxo

quietly outspoken

yawn.
im such a lazy ass.
i got up like half an hour ago. lol.
grrr.

im starting to get bored already.
sei lor.
i dont wanna start studying yet,
which means, i can either read, clean up my room or watch tv.
why is it so limited. :(

xoxo

i miss you so.

i want a punching bag please?

this made me laugh pretty hard. :)

sigh. alot of plans backfired.
dad couldnt make it due to a meeting he had to go for suddenly.
so yeah.
ended up following mum with her errands.

guess what? im grounded.
whopee.
dont ask why. lol

but like i had plans to go anywhere.
tomorrow night would have been hell to go anywhere. and im
not in the mood to face ou or curve.
so i planned
to sit by my rooftop to see the fireworks at klcc (if there is any)
cause my house has the best view. ;)

tomorrow: studying time.
its time for Q1 to come back.
xoxo

PS: give me a boy who can serenade like this:
click
and i promise you, i'll fall to the grounds. :)

PSS: i have two new gold fishes as pets. :)
and i named them bob and lola.
i wonder why i do this to myself sometimes.
i think its cause i need us to be alive in some other form than humans.

they say its the most deserving people that cannot help but love those who destroy them.

i think in some weird way, thats kinda true.

im uncertain bout the both of us now,

where we stand.

or more like what we are anymore.

sigh.

but im sorta glad ive got a few days alone to think to myself.

your song to me: already gone-kelly clarkson.

i think it best describes what you did.

xx

my homies.

picked up my super uber hot red sexy specs. ;)

they look darn good.

lol.

got dropped of at the curve,

because dearest megan ben and nick and thomas and azizul

wanted to take me out. :)

and besides, it was thomas's birthday too.

sorry i dont have a picture with you. lol.

got picked up and sent home by dad.

didnt really join the rest for dinner.

and in a way im glad i didnt.

i sorta wanted to stay home today and sulk. aha!

not.

i'll probably go throw stones at jian yong's or jeffrey's house later.

(totally kidding)

im seeing dad tomorrow for a proper sit down celebration.

which means i get to see my little brothers! :)

can you belive it?

my brother is only 6 and he knows how to search for songs and videos on the net. -.-

he's even tried finding videos on how to solve the rubics cube. -.-

oh my god right?

when i was 6 i could barely read or write properly.

i smell a genius coming along in the family. lol

xoxo

uncontrollable.

 

sigh.

you've put me through all sorts of rings an hoops to jump into.

you've made me stretch my patience beyond my limit.

you've made me break down those walls that guarded my heart so carefully for nearly two years.

and because of that,

i think ive lost my friends respect.

i used to be someone who was so independently strong.

and now,

im a fool for being so emotionally attached (as how adrian would have put it)

i may be use to it now.

but it is impossible for me to not care.

 i guess im sorry for expecting too much from a person.

its funny how one minute you're calling me

to apologize for being such an ass,

and the next you call me and we're arguing like a couple.

maybe we still are.

its just our title that keeps us bound from still being what we truly are.

or im probably just being in denial right now thinking we can still have what we had.

but the thing i cant wrap my head around,

is whether or not i want it still. 

its seriously mind boggling.

you're afraid to get close to me again,

because your feelings for me might backfire.that you could still want me again.

i cant see how that is wrong.

but its as though right now, you're just challenging fate.

well let me know how that works out for you.

because whether you like it or not,

or whether you wanna accept it or not,

im not going anywhere.

and you'll still be mine.

PS:i know i shouldnt be saying this, but i miss you.

as much of an ass you've been to me.

xx

happy birthday pops.

happy birthday pops.

:)

hopefully i'll be seeing you later.

xx

when all else fails, choose to be a lesbian! :)

just got back from heading to the curve with this fella,

:)

yes, he decided to be oh so nice and take me out. hah!

but its cool.

i like talking to him.

considering how negative he is, he reminds me off myself.

but he usually listens to all my shit.

i wonder how he does it. lol

thanks bub.

xx

your nothing but a piece of shithead to me.

i hate you.
i truly do now.

but then again, the hatred i feel now might be just a cover up
for how much i still deeply love you.

but you suck really.
you were never rude with me before.
and now your like a fucking jackass to me. making all sorts of lies and excuses.
since when did you turn into a bastard?
where was the boy i fell in love with?
the nice, sweet young at heart one?

you really do know how to kill someones mood.
i told you days before,
save friday for me.
what part of that did you not understand?
and you go on making other plans?
did i think it was just gonna be you and me?
HONESTLY?
yes i did.
i really did.
but its okay.
it shows how important i am to you.

if i wasnt so sleepy and moody and cranky,
i would have had the energy to cry.
but im so lazy.

band auditions are finally done.
pheww.
and i thank god, im going out tonight with a dear old friend.
hopefully my mind gets cleared up.

toorah.
xoxo

sweet dreams love

i thought today deserved two.
sigh.

didnt sleep last night.
AGAIN.
-.-

dont you just hate it, when the sudden rush of emotions just suddenly decide
to overtake your train of thoughts and that
then destroys your area of peace?

i hate it when it happens.
and to be frank, its been happening alot lately.
mother f.
i cant wait to get my period. -.-
atleast then i have a solid reason to go all pmsy and switch on
bitch mode.
heh.

the one thing i really hate.
are liars.

so stop lying to me would you?!

prom dinner

i just got back from ou. :)

omg wei. the day is been quite the productive.
started with me getting up early and showering and all.
the i left the hse to head to centerpoint around 12. and i sat there at starbucks waiting
for leenna and the decorator.
played around with leenna's itouch and i now have a fetish for it. :)
i want one. lol
the decorator came and we ended up covering everything we needed to do.
so pheww!

hung around for another hour discussing more things related to prom while i was
busy posting things on facebook. lalala.

headed to her hse after benita came and picked us up.
and i stuck around for their bm tuition with mr selvam.
he's good.
now i know why my sister scored an A in spm. heh
but its like omg, third teacher with different opinions on the marking scheme. haiyoh!

got ready around 6 ish and we left for ou.
dinner at gardens. ;)

i swear right, we were the noisest bunch there. (as usual)
but so so nice. :)
we couldnt stop laughing bout so many things.
i cant even remember what they were to even list it here. lol

pics.











individual shots of everyone:

ms nithia. :)


ben


trina


naa


marie


gilbert


ky lynn




nabihah


leenna







from here onwards, all taken by ky lynn (so excuse the retardedness)







































see, we changed the typical happy birthday song
to happy farewell.
exactly in the same tune. lol
it works. seriously.


ms nithia told the guy at secret recipe, to write "thanks 4 the good times"
and thats what she got. lol





















now, now. its not what you think. :)
see, ky lynn was pouting to the camera. and she snapped just as gilbert turned.
thus this came out. lol
i think its pretty cool.

sigh.
staying at home tomorrow.
and i have tuition at night. bugger.

i want a new camera. :(
peyton is dying on me. sigh.

xoxo